Bright and shiny objects

My kitchen is only about 8 feet wide. So to get from one side to the other, literally all I need to do is turn my body around. Seems simple enough. Yet somehow, during the 180 degree journey from one side to the other, I usually forget what I am looking for.

I wish I were kidding.

I'll open the oven, only to realize that I really needed something out of the fridge. I've been known to put the milk in the pantry and the cereal in the ice box.

Conclusion: I'm down with ADD. Be it a thought or an object, if it be bright and shiny, I be there. Did I mention that I have a hard time focusing?

In an effort to fight my flightiness, I have developed an elaborate system of tricks I use to combat my wandering brainwaves.

For example, I have a series of different hand motions I make for whatever it is I am looking for, so that when (not if) I forget what in tarnation it was I was seeking, I can just look down at my flailing paws and go "Oh, I remember. Can opener!"

But the worst is the bathroom. I am so prone to forgetting what I was working on prior to skipping to the loo that I put off powdering my nose until the last possible second. Clarification: That would be the second after my pee-pee dance reaches its DDR peek, and the second before I instead find myself seeking a mop and a pair of dry drawers.

So what's a well-hydrated girl to do? Answer: Carry whatever it is I am working on to the bathroom with me and leave it on the floor just outside the door. I call these my "props" as they help me to remember what my "scene" was prior to my restroom rendezvous during "intermission".

"Has anyone seen Jessica?"

"She's in the john."

"How do you know?"

"There is a boulder on the floor outside the door, that's how I know."

Finally, I talk to myself. Out loud. I mutter to myself. In fact, I'm doing it right now. I carry on conversations with myself about whatever it is I am doing. That way, if I forget, I can just ask myself later.

Hey, wait a second. How did I end up writing this blog anyway? I was totally doing something else? Self, what was it? Oh, I remember. Working!